Breast cancer support

Next Steps

Spring has arrived in our house even though you may beg to differ with this strange weather all of us seem to be getting at the moment.  Today is the exception and for the first time this year it feels warm when we venture out.     I am in the midst of decluttering… and it feels great.   How come we accumulate so much “stuff” over the years?       I have finished the kids rooms so now on to ours.  I have bags prepared for the younger cousins, another few bags for recycling and last of all a bag of items not worth keeping which I am glad to say there wasn’t  much of.   About once a year I get this urge to go through all our clothes and purge.     Conversely my father has mentioned a couple of times about sorting out our mother’s clothes and jewellery.   I have put him off and can’t even think about it as I feel that will be the final step we take. I haven’t even discussed it with my siblings yet.    It is still too painful, five months on.    Most of her items have not been touched since she died. There are clothes still on a chair in her room waiting for her return.  Isn’t it strange how grief manifests itself?

Our Easter holiday is coming to a close and in a way I am looking forward to getting back into a routine. We have had a very busy two weeks (in a good way) but I am now feeling very tired.    It was worth it though as the kids enjoyed their holiday and it is all about creating memories. I am so conscious of leaving good memories for my children if the worst ever happened. A bit maudlin I know but I am sure you understand exactly what I mean.  My exercise regime has faltered and I don’t need a scales to know that the Easter eggs are leaving me an unpleasant reminder.  I am now going to have to work hard at getting back into shape. Oh the joys!

My Cancer support centre rang me during the week and asked was I interested in participating in  a workshop for six weeks.  My instinct was to say no as I seem very busy at the moment  but I realised that not only do I need a little bit of self care but it was also very thoughtful of my centre to think of me as I am just five years on from my recurrence diagnosis. They seem to recognise that  life after cancer is so different and continued support is necessary no matter how long since diagnosis. So,  I have signed up with an open mind and will see what the next few weeks will bring.

Below are a few pictures from our Easter break.  Note the 500 year old tree. Makes one feel inconsequential.

Have a great week…


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